Throughout my years of being a nurse and then transitioning into the leadership role of a Director of Nursing (DON), there are certain skills I wish I had acquired before stepping into this position.
My number one?
Emotional Intelligence.
I could hold the clinical side of things down with no problem, but when it came to managing the emotional side, I had to dive deep into learning how to manage people and nurture relationships.
This is one area I focus on heavily with my new clients: It’s not just all clinical.
In the role of DON, you will quickly realize that you’re not just a leader—you’re a nurturer, companion, advocate, coach, and so much more.
Wearing all these hats means that understanding how to listen to listen—and not just listen to respond—is absolutely imperative.
1. Emotional Intelligence
Why it matters: As a Director of Nursing, you’re managing people just as much as you’re managing processes.
Emotional intelligence (EQ) is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions, while also recognizing and influencing the emotions of others.
It’s what allows you to lead with empathy, communicate effectively, and build trust within your team.
My journey: Early in my leadership career, I realized that while I had clinical skills down pat, managing the emotional side of leadership was a whole different game.
Learning to navigate these dynamics taught me that EQ is a key component of successful leadership.
2. Coaching and Mentoring
Why it matters: Coaching and mentoring are game-changers for growth—not just for your team but for yourself.
As a DON, you’re in a unique position to guide others on their journey while also seeking mentorship for your own growth.
Yet, so many nurse leaders try to figure things out on their own instead of seeking guidance from someone who has already walked the path.
My journey: My My My (in my Johnny Gill’s voice)—I wish I had coaching and mentorship early in my nursing career. Thankfully, I’m a self-learner, and I took it upon myself to seek out growth opportunities outside of work.
Now, I encourage all my clients to invest in themselves through coaching and mentorship—it’s a game-changer.
3. Strategic Thinking
Why it matters: My entire philosophy revolves around one core message:
Planning and Preparation Produces Positive Outcomes. Strategic thinking is a learned skill that gives you the ability to plan ahead, anticipate challenges, and ensure your facility’s success.
My journey: Strategic thinking allows you to stay two steps ahead—whether that’s planning for staffing needs, resident care, or preparing for surveys.
If you partner with the right coach or mentor, you’ll learn how to take your career and your facility’s operations to the next level by always looking ahead and preparing for what’s to come.
4. Adaptability
Why it matters: Healthcare is an ever-changing landscape, and as a DON, you need to pivot quickly and effectively.
Adaptability allows you to remain resilient, no matter the circumstances, and lead your team through any changes with confidence.
My journey: I know adaptability all too well. In the early stages of my career, I was often made fun of for switching roles every year or two.
People assumed I didn’t know what I wanted, but in reality, I was always learning, growing, and taking on new challenges.
Adaptability is what helped me move up quickly and confidently in my career.
I wasn’t afraid to push myself, to take on new opportunities, and to challenge myself. If I hadn’t embraced change, I would have risked becoming stagnant.
5. Organization and Time Management
Why it matters: Organization is not just a skill—it’s a survival tool. Without it, you risk burnout and inefficiency.
As a DON, the ability to manage your time, prioritize tasks, and keep your team on track is crucial for reducing stress and keeping your facility running smoothly.
My journey: Over the years, I developed systems to help me stay organized, including my DON Planner.
This tool has been a lifesaver, not only for me but for the clients I work with. It’s about more than just getting through the day—it’s about planning, prioritizing, and executing with purpose.
Final Thoughts
Being a Director of Nursing is a journey—one filled with growth, challenges, and opportunities.
These five underutilized skills—emotional intelligence, coaching and mentoring, strategic thinking, adaptability, and organization—are the foundation for thriving in this role.
It’s not just about what you know, but how you lead, grow, and adapt along the way.
Invest in yourself, learn from others, and never stop developing the skills that will take you, your team, and your facility to new heights.
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